Have you ever walked up to an Emmy award-winning actor who deals drugs on a TV show that you know absolutely nothing about, and requested crystal meth while dressed as a scantily-clad version of Tinkerbell in a black bustier and forest nymph wings with drag queen-esque make-up at a Neverland/Lost Boys-themed birthday party? Don't do it. I learned that lesson last weekend at my "Age of Jesus" (ahem, 33) birthday party at O.P. Rockwell on Saturday night when someone apparently named "Aaron Paul" (you might know him) and his crew came into the bar and lounged in the velvet couches in the corner. He gave me the look of death and said, "What did you just say? Did you really just ask me for meth? Why do you think I would do meth?!" Oops. I followed it up with, "Are you guys here for a birthday party?!" with a big smile...when I really wanted to say, "The only reason you're here is because it's my birthday party, punk!" (it's off-season in Park City and good ol' Scott Thompson is my bud). Kindness wins. I'm the idiot for asking him for meth (which, by the way, I didn't really want and never have done...just say "NO" to drugs - thank you, D.A.R.E.).
One of the best things about life on this earth is that we are constantly able to learn and grow. It's the best gift the Universe could give us. For instance: if you see him in the bar, don't go up to Aaron Paul and ask him for Crystal Meth. That's one of those lessons. In my time on this planet, I've learned a few more, which I shared last year at this time. Since I shared those lessons, I've started to compile a list of "things that make me unlikely to trust you" which include the following:
- Bluetooth headsets
- Neck pillows on planes
- Mountain Dew-drinking (especially in the morning)
- Opting for AC vs. windows down on roadtrips
- Aversion to short-haired chicks
- Kid leashes
- A man who doesn't oblige when I ask him if I can cup his beard
- Anyone who doesn't smile when they see what I wrote on the back of my credit card ("ID Me, FOOL")
- Men who wear foundation when they're hungover and trying to hide it
- Vegans (except for Chelsea)
- Men who have weak stomachs...I have specifics, but I'm trying to be PC here - sort of.
Also, and a bit more seriously, I'll add to my list an important lesson I've learned in a poignant manner in the last 12 months. Don't waste time with people who don't want to spend their time with you. You deserve to be appreciated and loved like the special human that you are. Add to that: true, pure love is not suffocating...it's the most freeing feeling you'll ever experience.
What does Jesus have to do with it?! Well, he was apparently 33 when he died. To me, I think 33 makes me think a bit more...spend less time on the things that don't matter...the people that don't matter. But it also makes you more grateful and loving and sensitive to the things that do matter. That's pretty special.
What was with the the Neverland/Lost Boys Theme? We're all searching...some of us with more intention than others. We're all on a journey and some of us are more lost than others. However, we're all trying to navigate and find our way in this beautiful mess called life. That's what unites us, and that's cool. One day at a time. One foot in front of the other. Baby steps. Patience. I'm learning, but I'm moving slowly. When I have a rough day or an off interaction, I remind myself that we're all doing the best we can with the tools we have. That helps me to find empathy in most situations.
So, even though I think Aaron Paul should carry around blue rock candy in his pocket with a water gun, I'll be empathetic because I can imagine how annoying it is for fans to come up and ask for crystal meth. Especially when they don't even watch TV. Or actually know who he is in the first place. And they're wearing forest nymph wings and drag queen-esque make-up.
Always learning, always growing...even if it's in Neverland,